Earlier this year I wrote about how poor behavior by fans is contributing to the shortage of officials. More recently, sportsmanship—and the value of shaking hands with opponents after a game—was in the news after two very unsportsmanlike incidents between college coaches.

Merriam-Webster defines sportsmanship as:

 conduct (such as fairness, respect for one's opponent, and graciousness in winning or losing) becoming to one participating in a sport

There have been many examples during the pandemic of how good behavior and kindness in general have declined. I am reminded of the book “All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten,” by Robert Fulghum that became popular in the 90s.

I’m sure the kindergarten teachers are working as hard as ever to teach children how to be respectful, but they could use some help. Children are influenced by all the adults in their lives, including those they observe in public arenas. Coaches, like kindergarten teachers, are in a prime position to make an impression on kids.

Respect 

It all starts with respect. Children who play sports should be taught to be respectful of their coaches, teammates, and yes, their opponents. After all, there wouldn’t be a game if both sides weren’t ready and willing to meet each other on the field.

Two teams competing understand how hard the other has worked to get there. Players can appreciate the skill of their opponent because they know how difficult it is to achieve.

Competitors help us become better as we practice the skills necessary to outplay them. And when they outplay us, we learn something about the game or about ourselves. Without the experience, there is no room to improve or grow. So, regardless of the score, thanks are in order. 

Teach the children well

Parents and youth coaches need to teach and model respect for their players. High school players and their coaches need to model it for all those watching. If bad behavior is contagious, we can hope good behavior is as well.

Teaching children about sportsmanship should happen right along with teaching the skills and strategy of the game, so they understand that when they say “good game,” or thank their opponent for a good match, it has a much bigger meaning.

Resources

The Positive Coaching Alliance provides resources and support for coaches, athletes, parents, and leaders.

One of the principles of the Positive Coaching Alliance is “Honoring the game.” They encourage sportsmanship and respect for all aspects of sport through the acronym ROOTS: Rules, Opponents, Officials, Teammates, and Self.

photo by Chris Liverani on Unsplash